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Friday, November 17
Where have I been?

Where?  Same place I have been.  I would apologize for the lack of communication if I felt the need to.  We are in the new place and everyone is thrilled about it.  It took less than a day for the animals to adapt (or so it seemed) although I hope we don't get new neighbors until we've retrained the dog to do his business on the new side of the yard.  It doesn't help that he was able to run all around both sides for the last two months.

In other news, there is a hell of a lot of family drama going on right now and the timing sucks as we head into the holidays.  Who knows when I'll post again.

Posted at 12:30 pm by the monkey
SHOCK THE MONKEY  

Thursday, October 19
My dog Dumb

Remember my post about the cats and their escape attempt through the screen?  Thumper had fixed it a couple days after that and we didn't give it another thought.

Till last night.

As Thumper was starting to head over and open the screen door to let the dog in to the house, Rolo walked through it.  Not as in (read in a Forrest Gump or Al Gore voice) "I'm a-running to the doorah and I can't stop in timeh."

No.  He walked through it as if it wasn't there, shredding the screen and taking the entire door off the track and into the room a good foot and a half.  Completely oblivious to the destruction left in his wake.

If this had been the only incident, I would have chalked it up to "bad dog" behavior and chastised him.  But roughly a week ago Thumper was going to let him out and before he could get to the door, Rolo tried to run through it.

The glass door.

The dirty glass door.  (thanks to some rain and a cat who will lick anything, including windows, doors, mirrors and feet)

Again, I might chalk it all up to bad eyesight... but there are other stories for other days.

Did I mention he's a big ass Rott looking dog?  Dumb as a nail sometimes... but he's got a heart of gold.

Posted at 9:23 am by the monkey
SHOCK THE MONKEY  

Thursday, October 12
The end

There is no denying it now.  32 degrees outside and snow.  SNOW.  I am so not ready for winter.  I want to cry.  Where did my summer go?

Posted at 8:56 am by the monkey
(1) SHOCKED THE MONKEY  

Wednesday, October 4
An astute observation, albeit a bit tardy

I didn't catch this til just a little bit ago...

Crazy went to Dee (landlord) to ask permission to park in our driveway (and learned it is our driveway - I'm still giddy on that one) but she never came over to ask us for permission.  Gee.

She parks in the bottom of our (current) driveway when we first move in and never bothers to check if we're okay with it or if she's in the way of us moving.  Hmm.

Verrry interrresting.  Think she hates us?

I refuse to put up with her sheet.

Posted at 8:40 pm by the monkey
SHOCK THE MONKEY  

Real time stupidity

So...

I'm going to post this in real time, just for your reading pleasure.

6:00 pm:
Crazy comes home from wherever she was coming from.  I had parked my friend's car where she would normally park because there is no room in our driveway, but I parked the way you should.  Parallel.  Whore comes home and parks parallel too.  Right next to my friend's car.  I have pictures that I'll post later to show you what exactly that looked like.  To me, it looks like some stress relief and a phone call to the police.  :)

6:17 pm:
The police have been called and they will be here "shortly".

6:34 pm:
It looks as if the parking enforcement is here... but we're on stealth mode.  More to come.

6:37 pm:
She's arguing with the parking official...

6:46 pm:
Parking official just drove away and whore has just moved her car.  We sit in anticipation.  Did she get a ticket?  She spent a long time talking to the parking lady.  She did move her car.  Will she know that we called the cops?  Will she take her stress out on my friend's car?  stay tuned for developments as they unfold...

7:09 pm:
After talking to the people whose house she parked in front of and then talking to our new landlord (to see if she could use the empty driveway next to us) she has gone back into her batcave.  My friend's car is untouched and I suspect that it will be left untouched.  If any vehicle is touched, I think it will be the beast or Thumper's truck.  Who's to say if anything will be done.  Unfortunately our new landlord let it slip that she is our new landlord.  It ruins the surprise I talked about in another post.  Bummer.  Fortunately I'm sure it made the whore livid to realize that we not only have our half of the driveway now, we have the whole driveway.  At least for a month.  Ha.

7:15 pm:
Whore takes little offspring to go only she knows where.  The whole entire time she's walking to the car (oooooo, across the culdesac, what a walk!!) she's staring down our side of the house.  If looks could kill our garden would be pushing up daisies.  Hee.  Hee.  Hee.

Posted at 6:26 pm by the monkey
(1) SHOCKED THE MONKEY  

Tuesday, October 3
The Waiting Game

No insurance = no more x-rays (for now)

No insurance = no battery of tests (for now)

No x-rays + no tests = no answers

No answers = living with pain till insurance or lottery is won

We wait.

Posted at 11:30 am by the monkey
(1) SHOCKED THE MONKEY  

Saturday, September 30
No update

The trailer for the hot tub fell through this weekend, so that is on hold till possibly next weekend or later.  My next doctor appointment is Tuesday but I don't expect anything to be resolved from it.  Considering that I'm reliving exactly what happened last time almost eerily so... he told me nothing before and I expect him to tell me nothing this time.  Which makes me wonder why I just don't skip that step and go straight to the specialist... although after seeing three of them last time, I don't hold much water with them either.  *le sigh*

Starting tomorrow or Monday we'll be fixing up the new place and moving in sometime within/during the month.  I'm really excited as it means level floors, carport with storage and a huge garden.  Not to mention space between us and the wench next door.... 

New lease: over 700 dollars. 
Paint: your guess is as good as mine. 
Hot tub: almost free. 
Seeing the look on the whore's face when she finds out 1) we're moving but 2) we're only moving next door and 3) we have a hot tub: priceless.

Posted at 7:10 pm by the monkey
(1) SHOCKED THE MONKEY  

Tuesday, September 26
Raging monkey

So....

Today the pain was extreme enough to warrant a visit to a doctor.  Even still I felt like digging in my heels (ha) but decided it was worth it for a release from pain.  When it's disturbing my sleep (not to mention my fun) it is time to do something drastic.

So to the emergency room we go.

The prognosis (after poking, prodding and a few token x-rays) are a possible break, but most likely nerve damage.

Nerve.

Damage.

I'm on Neurontin or however the hell you spell it, and Ibuprofin or however you want to spell that one too.  Heh.

Oh... and get this!!!!

Cast is a good idea (well duh... been wearing it for a couple of days and it does somewhat help) but this is the kicker (again, ha) - I have to go back onto crutches.

For now.  Until otherwise notified.  I figure that means until they figure out whether it's nerve or break and if it's break, healed, or nerve, dead.

YIPPEE YAY AY MOTHERFUCKER.

Just shoot me now.

End result: absolutely no pressure on the foot for now and do whatever necessary for pain (whether ice, heat, soaks or pills).

fuck.

Posted at 4:23 pm by the monkey
(2) SHOCKED THE MONKEY  

Saturday, September 23
Lost and found again

Found: walking cast from the last time I broke my foot so I can now hobble around somewhat.  Too bad the drugs aren't working.

Lost: my sense of humor today.  Chalk it up to the pain and ineffective painkillers.

Found: multiple broken stems on plants.  Bad bad bad cats.

Lost: hair.  trim and slight style, don't worry... I see braids in my future.

Posted at 11:24 am by the monkey
(1) SHOCKED THE MONKEY  

Wednesday, September 20
RIP Rose baby

Mother Nature and the doctors finally won out and she slipped through the mortal coil last night as Thumper and I slipped into bed.  Such a sad story but she is in such a better place.  Her heart and will power are things to be envied and I will forever remember her.  Rest in peace angel girl.

Posted at 7:34 am by the monkey
(1) SHOCKED THE MONKEY  

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